Salon XXXVIII: What does rain evoke for you? Growing up, what were you told about sex? And more…

~Sunday~  Tonight we had our 38th Salon meeting, at Mitch’s, and we finished discussing the 9 agenda items right as Mitch’s was closing, almost 3 hours to the minute of starting.

As always, a rip-roaring, cheek-hurting (from laughing) good time was had by all.

For your reading pleasure, here is our agenda with my answers included:

Salon XXXVIII
Sunday, September 8, 2013
Salon Headquarters

  1. I'm interested in everyone's thoughts on seeing, ""EmpBen_Srchg: $.12" on your restaurant bill. Article: Are you "Surcharging" Your Customers Away? [John]

    I think it’s infuriating. As a customer, I don’t care about your internal business problems. Just add that shit to the cost of the food.

  2. Have you ever been called by a nickname? If you were going to go by one of your own choice, what would it be? Question inspired by: Why You Should Let People Call You by a Nickname (Fortune 50 CEOs do). [John]

    I never have. My dad was called Manny, which is short for Manuel, which made me wonder if a variation or shortening of a name (e.g., Bob for Robert) is a nickname.

    The Wikipedia entry for nickname says:

    A nickname is "a usually familiar or humorous but sometimes pointed or cruel name given to a person or place, as a supposedly appropriate replacement for or addition to the proper name",[1] or a name similar in origin and pronunciation from the original name. It can also be the familiar or truncated form of the proper name,[2] which may sometimes be used simply for convenience (e.g. "Bobby", "Bob", "Rob", or "Bert" for the name Robert).

    The term hypocoristic is used to refer to a nickname of affection between those in love or with a close emotional bond, compared with a term of endearment. The term diminutive name refers to nicknames that convey smallness, hence something regarded with affection or familiarity (e.g., referring to children), or contempt.[3]

    The distinction between the two is often blurred. It is a form of endearment and amusement. As a concept, it is distinct from both pseudonym and stage name, and also from a title (for example, City of Fountains), although there may be overlap in these concepts. A nickname is often considered desirable, symbolizing a form of acceptance, but can sometimes be a form of ridicule.

    Every once in a while, my friend Joe refers to me as “Mahty,” and it’s in the context of my forgetting something or when we’re traveling together and having breakfast and I get my meds out. He’ll say, “Take ya pills, Mahty!”

  3. What would your preferred metaphor to talk about sex be? Here’s a suggested one: Al Vernacchio: Sex needs a new metaphor. [John]

    The one suggested in the video, pizza, works for me. Anything but a sports metaphor!

  4. Let's answer these three questions around this infographic: Goodreads Top Five Most Abandoned Books. [John]
    • Have you abandoned any of the books in the "Top 5 Abandoned Classics" section?

      I abandoned Atlas Shrugged. Like several people I’ve talked to, I read The Fountainhead first, and liked it so much, I started Atlas Shrugged, but abandoned it.

      The only other one of the five that I’ve read is Moby Dick.

    • From the options in the "What keeps you turning pages?" section, which one most resonates with you?

      “As a rule, I like to finish things.”

    • From the options in the "When do you abandon a book?" section, which one most resonates with you?

      “Ridiculous (or nonexistent) plot.”

  5. We (want to) know what you did last summer. Let's carve out some time to catch up after long time and long miles away from one another. 🙂 [Anna]
    • Had the worst job situation in 33 years of professional life
    • Applied to 4 companies for jobs – SAS, RTI, Timely Text, and Red Hat (via The Select Group (TSG))
    • Attended Southern Decadence
    • Got a job offer from Red Hat through TSG and gave NC State my notice on 09/05/13
  6. What does rain evoke for you? Do different types of rain evoke different thoughts and feelings? Does the season make a difference? [Kim]

    You might remember from my list of things that I know are irrational, but I do or think anyway, that one of my main thoughts about rain is that working out during it is about the absolute best use of rain I can imagine.

    The only kind of rain that evokes any kind of thoughts and feelings is driving rain for a long amount of time, and what it evokes is a sort of PTSD memory of Hurricane Fran flooding, during which we lost 40 trees and dealt with a stinking, flooded first floor of our house being under a foot of water for a couple of days, and no power for over a week.

  7. Dear daughter: I hope you have awesome sex. What were you told growing up? How has that impacted your relationship to sex? If you have children, what do/will you tell your children? [Kim]

    What a wonderful life view. I like that he included “genderqueers” in this sentence: “Yes, all these boys and girls and genderqueers may break your heart…”. I loved his use of the word “consigliere.”

    I wasn’t told a thing from my parents, at least not that I remember. My sex education was experiential.

  8. Activity: Write "The Guide to Being Our Boyfriend.” Note: This is a non-standard item. [Kim]

    We had various and sundry interpretations of this question, and mine was one of the wrong ones. Kim meant, what characteristics would we expect of a boyfriend of Salon (as an entity), not a list of characteristics of what we like in a personal boyfriend, which is how I answered it.

    But, since I took the time, here are the characteristics that I look for in a boyfriend/partner:

    • Be intellectually curious
    • Be self-aware
    • Be fiscally healthy
    • Appreciate the diversity of all humanity
    • If you own pets, love them unconditionally
    • At least some hair on your body would be hot
    • Be willing to bottom
    • Live close, visit often
    • Have (and keep) your own group of friends, and preferably have several groups of friends from different aspects of your life
    • Laugh with me

    With that said, Anna interpreted the question correctly, and had a smart, side-splitting list that I hope to share as soon as she sends a copy of it to me.

  9. What is the most odd, funny, horrifying, or weird thing you’ve discovered about someone while you were on a date with them? [John]

    I got this question from Single Dad Laughing’s blog. Here are some of the answers he ended up publishing:

    • He told me he would sleep walk, drive places, and wake up later with a dead animal hacked to pieces in the back of the car.
    • He told me he “Had a place on his parents’ property.” What he meant was that he lived in a bus in their driveway.
    • That she had previously been paid to poo on someone.
    • He told me that he had a teenage proclivity to have “relations” with oranges. It involved cutting an access hole in the fruit and a microwave. I wish I was making this up.
    • One guy tried to interlace our toes as we cuddled. The same way you hold hands. Weirdest move EVER.
    • Right before a date this guy says he ripped his favorite jeans in the crotch (we were talking in the phone) When he met me at the restaurant he says ” look I fixed them” (safety pinned it together) and just then the pin gave and one of his balls popped out.
    • I dated a guy once. The whole night he kept his hands in his pockets. When we were walking home, I reached inside his pocket and he didn’t have hands.

    Here's a link to the blog entry, No Second Date For You, if you want to read the rest of them that he published.

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