I don’t have no TV, errands, a workout, Shortbus, and Hoedown ’08…

My day started off with a very funny telephone survey conversation.

The survey was about video- and movie-watching habits, and after asking me how many movies anyone in my household had seen in the last 30 days (1, on 03/08/08) and how many movies from a video rental store anyone in my household has seen in the last 30 days (zero), she said, “And how many televisions in your home, sir?”

“Zero,” I said.

“Zero? You don’t have no TVs in your house, sir?” She said, and I cringed.

“No, I haven’t had a TV for six years.” [I resisted saying, “No I haven’t had no TVs in my house for six years, nor do I not have no bad grammar up in here.”]

“Six years, sir?”

“Yes.”

“Don’t you miss it?” I’m sure that at this point, we were veering off the script.

“I really don’t,” I responded.

“I’ve never called anyone who doesn’t have a television,” she stammered.

“Does that disqualify me for the survey?” I asked trying to get her back on track.

“Oh, no, let’s go on,” she said.

After maybe five more minutes of questions, she got to the Internet place.

“Have you been online, on the Internet, in the last 30 days at all?”

I laughed, and said, “Oh yes, I’m on the Internet at least 12 hours a day, no exaggeration.”

“12 hours sir? Don’t you get tired of it?”

I responded, “No. People don’t get tired of watching TV all the time, do they?”

“Well, no, they don’t.” Then quiet for a second. “Six years, sir?”

“Do you subscribe to the newspaper, sir?”

“No, I read the newspaper online.”

“Of course you do, sir.” Her comments just made me chuckle.

It was quite a funny conversation, mostly because after she was finally able to accept that I didn’t have a TV, she’d start several questions and then, mid-sentence would say, “Oh, you don’t have a TV; nevermind.”

At the end she said, “Sir, this was the shortest interview I’ve ever done. Thank you so much for your time.”


I got a call from the library that a book I had requested was in. I heard about this book on NPR’s People’s Pharmacy, and it sounded very, very intriguing to me: Judith Beck’s Train Your Brain to Think Like a Thin Person.

I can’t wait to read it.


Mid-afternoon, I ran by the library to pick up said book, with a follow-on stop at The Fresh Market right next door, where I picked up a Pumpkin Praline Scotchie Coffee Cake, which Robert and I have had once before, and was delicious.

The irony was not lost on me, when, as the cashier went to hand me the bag with the cake in it, I asked him to lay my “How to Train Your Brain to Think Like a Thin Person” inside the bag on the cake.

My next stop was at the K-Mart on Western Blvd to get a copy of TurboTax, but much to my chagrin, they only sold TaxCut instead. I ended up picking up some spray hair gel and a few articles of workout-related clothing instead: a tank-top, a pair of sweat shorts, and a bag of four pair of boxer briefs.

On to the gym, where I did an hour of cardio, and listened to a delightful podcast of The Story, called Queen for a Day:

One result of the writers’ strike is that we’re now seeing a new flood of reality programs on television. But programs featuring real people were all the rage back when TV was in its infancy. Just ask JoAnne Rushton and Debra Cotich. In 1957 their mother, Evelyn Stuart, starred in one the biggest hits of all time—Queen for a Day.

Queen for a Day was the ultimate rags-to-riches drama. Ten million people a day watched as hard-up housewives poured out their tales of woe and then asked for a wish. The audience chose the winner, then cheered as she was showered with gifts.

Evelyn’s daughters tell Dick Gordon how the event changed their lives. They also reveal the surprise discovery they made after their mom died last year.

Today’s workout statistics:

Exercise Type
Minute
Duration
Calories Burned
or Area Worked

Cardio
(Elliptical)

60

1043


We had stuffed red bell peppers, a recipe I tried from the Internet, for dinner. They were pretty good; I see a re-do in my future. We also had some mushroom soup, and some shrimp cocktail with it.


We watched the movie, Shortbus, which I’d borrowed from Geromy a couple of weeks ago at dancing.

Movie Synopsis: Numerous New York City-dwellers come to the exclusive club Shortbus to work out problems in their sexual relationships.

Rob and Sophia are a happily married couple, except for the fact that she has never experienced sexual climax. This irony follows her to work, because she is a couples counselor who frequently has to deal with the sexual issues other couples have.

Two of her patients are Jamie and James, a gay couple who have been monogamous for five years and counting. James wants to bring other men in to the relationship, and his own history with depression may hint at an ulterior motive.

Ceth (Pronounced like Seth) may be the perfect addition to their family, but Caleb, a voyeur from across the street, may have his own ideas about that.

Sophia visits Severin, a dominatrix with secrets of her own to reveal.

All I’m going to say about this movie is that I’m glad I didn’t pay money to rent it. With that said, however, we did watch the whole thing. I certainly can’t imagine ever buying this film.


Tonight was “Hoedown ’08” at Flex, so instead of stopping the dancing at 10:30 like we normally do, we danced until close to 1:00. We had between 10-15 dancers come to town from Charlotte, so it was just a fun, fun night.

I’m not saying I danced a lot, and sweat a lot, but I did go through two t-shirts during the night.

At home, after a quick bite and a glorious hot shower, I was out like a light. Bed sweet bed.

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