Leftover buscapades, campus is teeming again, and you look TIRED!

~Wednesday~ The only thing worse than buscapades are leftover buscapades. Sorry. This happened yesterday on the way home, and I forgot to capture it.

A piggy banker got on the bus, but before she started the coin clanging, she said to the bus, “Anyone got a nickel?”

I have really got to start keeping some change in my pocket. Once again, I checked my pockets and in every crevice of my computer bag for some coins to no avail. Finally, I held out a dollar (not folded the long way with my arm extended all the way like I do for drag queens, though), and she inched her way close to me on the long, center-facing seat she was sitting on in front of me.

She started counting out all these dimes and nickels in an effort to get to $.95, I presume, got through a good number of them, and then started over again after messing up.

I saw two quarters in the midst of all that change and said, “Just give me $.50.” She thanked me profusely.

This morning’s buscapade consisted of the Cell Phone Lady, who I haven’t seen, or more accurately heard, in a while. She got on at her usual stop just before the intersection of Gorman Street and Western Boulevard, and as is her MO, sat within two seats of me, talked the entire ride, and in a volume such that you’d’ve thought she was talking face-to-face with someone who was sitting in front of me.

“Yes. I’m really happy with the dress, actually. It’s got this cape with it that I really like. I blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah…”

I’d turn to her and say, “He’s a quarter, call someone who cares,” but I think she already has. Damnit.


This morning, I had two meetings, but one of them got canceled. I felt like I made a decent contribution in the one I did attend.

For lunch, I walked down Hillsborough Street to Laziz Biryani Corner for their Kabob Wrap for lunch, which as always was out of this world. Hillsborough Street was absolutely teeming with folks, as it’s the first day of classes for the Fall semester, so the students are back. The eye candy was unequivocal.

This afternoon, I did three edit jobs—two for the Outreach Technology guys and one for my officemate, Rhonda.


Someone tweeted today something to the effect of: “A friend of mine just told me that I looked tired.” To which I tweeted back the first tweet below that kicked off a lively discussion on Facebook once my tweet was converted into status update there.


John Martin:
  I always wonder what’s in the head of people who tell other people they look tired. What do they hope to accomplish with the comment?

Jenna Moore:  Usually, sympathy.

Julie Proctor:  I always want to reply to those people with something like “Wow! Your hair’s gotten a lot grayer since I last saw you.”

Steve Harris:  hhmmm, i always thought it was a nice way of saying “U look like hell !!!”

Nichole Brewer:  no it’s a nice way of saying “you look old”.

John Martin:  LOL. Y’all are great. I think the next time someone says that to me, I’ll say, “And this information would help me HOW?”

Kevin Reinstein:  are you sure they didn’t say you ARE tired? 😉

John Martin:  LOL. That usually comes in the form of “you tired old queen.” 🙂

Kevin Reinstein:  nah, not you, my friend! well … old queen, yes … but not tired!! 🙂

Will Parsons:  Insult and compassion simultaneously! It’s a win-win in my book.

Dorothy Drennen:  Open invitation to wail a bit about why one looks tired. “Yeah, I know, …… happened, is happened, is causing me to worry, is … well, making me tired.” Like that.

John Martin:  Thanks for another perspective, Dorothy. So, are you saying that you’ve made the comment before and that’s the reason you make it–to give someone else a chance to unload like that? Or are you saying that if/when someone says it to you, you see it as an invitation by them for you to talk about such things going on with you to them?

Dorothy Drennen:  Yes. If I note that you look tired, and i care about you, that’s a worry to me…. and putting it out there is an opening for you to share about why you look tired, and for me to offer such support as may be. Maybe it works better with a small addition.. “You look tired. You ok?” For me, of course, the typical answer is something vague like “yeah, a lot going on just now” or something equally unhelpful for the sharing dynamic…. but that’s just me.

John Martin:  Ah gotcha. Well, this has been a very interesting exchange. It reminds me of the idea behind “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus.” That is, something is being said. The person saying it thinks of it in one way, the person hearing it thinks of it in a totally different way. What we have here, in this particular exchange, is someone who means it as a gesture of caring and four or five people who hear it as an insult. I’m not really sure by Jenna’s comment if she hears it as caring or an insult. Thanks, everyone, for sharing your thoughts.

Lynne Belcher Burgess:  Men are from Cars and Women are from Penis.

John Martin:  LOL

Jonathan Bitner:  Which reminds me of this…. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5WNO7PVr_N4


I received affirmations from three sources today, one was an explicit affirmation, and two of them were implicit affirmations:

  • A direct message tweet from my friend Kevin (av8rdude): heard: country song “people are crazy” by billy currington. actually liked it. made me think of you. miss ya. HUGS.
  • Two colleagues of mine asked me to edit some of their work, when they weren’t required to.
  • And someone I don’t know commented on my yesterday’s blog posting saying, “I found your blog via 30threads and, being a fellow bus rider, was enjoying your bus observations.”

I was a little taken aback by this story on wral.com today: Durham police probe shooting near library.

This is the very library in which I stopped last night to kill (no pun intended) a half-hour before going to my board meeting. Gracious.


Dancing was dead tonight. I left at 10:45, when the majority of the dancers were out on the smoker’s patio.

Leave a Comment