~Friday~ Madonna and Genetically-Beautiful Daughter (a.k.a. Sophia), did what, by now, has become their routine—that is to say, they got off the bus at the stop after I got on.
The Waffle House Man sat in front of me holding a half-eaten breakfast that I got a quick look at as I passed him to take the seat behind him. It was in a to-go container with a clear lid. One of the items was an omelet.
He must have had a rough overnight shift, because he kept falling asleep, tipping forward so far that he jerked himself awake just before falling out of his seat. This happened about three times between when I got on and when I got to work. If it had been a Three Stooges episode, I’m quite sure his face would have landed in his food at one point.
Between stops, I looked out the window to see this woman walking on the sidewalk taking a pair of Apple Bottom Jeans to their absolute limit. I immediately thought of that song, “Baby Got Back.”
[Intro]
Oh, my, god. Becky, look at her butt.
It is so big. *scoff* She looks like,
one of those rap guys’ girlfriends.
But, you know, who understands those rap guys? *scoff*
They only talk to her, because,
she looks like a total prostitute, ‘kay?
I mean, her butt, is just so big.
I can’t believe it’s just so round, it’s like,
out there, I mean – gross. Look!
She’s just so … black!
[Sir Mix-a-Lot]
I like big butts and I can not lie
You other brothers can’t deny
That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist
And a round thing in your face
You get sprung, wanna pull out your tough
‘Cause you notice that butt was stuffed
Deep in the jeans she’s wearing
I’m hooked and I can’t stop staring…
That song just makes me laugh. Watch the video.
After putting my stuff down at my desk, I walked across the street to the campus food atrium to get a cup of coffee and a biscuit from the Chick-fil-A there. The coffee cups were out, so I asked one of the ladies behind one of the serving counters if there were more.
She came around and grabbed a tube from the cabinet under the counter and stuffed it into the holder, which is horizontal and right at face level. The tube started to shoot right back out, so she jammed it all the way back in and then caught the edge of the bottom of the first cup behind an inside rim of the holder to sort of hold it there.
I looked at that, and then at her, and I said, “I’m not touching that cup. That tube will spring, and it’ll poke my eye out.”
“Oh lawdy!” she howled as if that was the funniest thing she’d ever heard, and she handed me a cup from the top of the next tube of cups before she put them in the next holder.
Not as funny as an OSHA claim, I thought, but then laughed, too—mostly at how tickled she got about the whole thing. I was very tempted to stay around to see what went down when the first person did take a cup from that top tube.
I worked all morning on some Frequently Asked Questions, as they were an agenda item on a 1:00 meeting I went to.
I met my friend Suzanne, of the Mostly Social Book Club, who was on campus from 2:00-4:00 for an open house about a potential master’s degree program that she’s interested in, and we went to Two Guys for dinner. We split what I think was called “The Athenian” pizza, and each had a side salad. And of course, we had great conversation.
I caught the Wolfline #5 Varsity bus from which I connected to the #9 Greek Village bus, which stops closest to my house. I got at least 30 minutes of walking exercise today between meeting Suzanne and walking with her and catching the buses to get around and back home.
I lay down at 8:00 and worked on a crossword puzzle just a little while before falling asleep. I had set my alarm for 11:30, at which time I’d decide about going to the midnight drag show at Legends.
At 11:30, I turned that sucker off, and rolled right over.